T2+Rimu+Story

__Friday 24 June 2011__

L.I. We are learning to edit and proof read our writing

S.C. We have
 * made it make sense and flow nicely when reading
 * used a thesaurus
 * changed the order of the sentence to sound more interesting, e.g. starting with a action verb\


 * Before**
 * After**

__Thuresday 23 June 2011__

L.I. We are learning to edit and proof read our writing

S.C. We have
 * made it make sense and flow nicely when reading
 * used a thesaurus
 * changed the order of the sentence to sound more interesting, e.g. starting with a action verb\


 * Before**
 * After**

__Friday 17 June 2011__

L.I. We are learning to edit and proof read our writing

S.C. We have
 * made it make sense and flow nicely when reading
 * used a thesaurus
 * changed the order of the sentence to sound more interesting, e.g. starting with a action verb

**After**


__Thursday 16 June 2011__

__Blurb__ Kobey and Lia are twins and they going to school. On the way they saw roadworks cars lights flashing and thunder coming in. It was a small earthquake. They arrived at school and Their teacher didn't recognize them they thought they were new. So after that day they went home and their house was locked and they couldn't get in. They broke in somehow and a woman was going to cal 111.